Caught by the hook.

We feel trapped. We know it, but we won’t admit it. We actually like it somehow. But in the end it swallows us whole. We have known that all along, yet we haven’t done much about it. We didn’t want to. We were hopeful, that may be the tables will turn and everything will be all merry, just like you had imagined in your mind.

We all have crushes and people we love. We are sometimes scared to convey our feelings. So we keep them locked up. But we have that inhibition to show it, express it in any way possible. Eventually a possibility arises where we could do that. A phone call or a text message does that trick. You had been waiting for that text like forever and finally you jump with joy. It says your help is needed. You feel special, you feel wanted, you see yourself as the one saving the world (almost). And that is when we become numb in our minds and nod yes to everything they say. You are the savior, she had been waiting for, you say to yourself. And no matter what, you are ready to do whatever is put forth. Even if was something impossible, it’s a yes from your side. And try your best to make it happen. It is to show that you care, you could do what they ask for. And all you get in return is a thank you (sometimes) and a forgotten help.

The problem with this is under appreciation and taking you for granted. They never liked you as much as you had thought. They just knew you as a guy who could do thing(s) for them. Eventually, you will be forgotten and erased from the memory. But you would never forget that. You will save that text or that voice asking you for help. You will be hopeful, still. That someday they will realize what you had done for them. But what you fail to realize something really important.

And at one point you would snap out that delusion. You will lose all that hope. You will lose that secret admiration you had for them. You lose that hidden feelings you had for them.  But then you could do nothing about it. You are forgotten from their memory. You become nothing. And that deed you did for them, what deed ?

---